So as stated on Tuesday I’ve hit 100 subscribers on YouTube. I think that’s in major part to starting to arrange my own covers, and recording myself on camera for said covers. I also set a goal to post 2 covers a month, and this month I had two…technically. I had one arranged for the longest time, but for some reason I didn’t record the vocals for it until last week. I was going to record video footage for it this past weekend, but didn’t get to it, and there starts my dilemma.
I usually record video on the weekends. Like, I’m pretty sure I’m conditioned to do that because the thought of recording video during the week just erks me, and I’m not motivated to do so. I think it’s because I gear myself up to prepare to record on Sunday (but I’ll probably do it on Saturday this weekend, I want to get it done) because I do vocal warm ups all week and take a break on the weekends to rest my voice. So I take that time to do other things, usually bake or record video depending on what I need to do.
So back to setting a two covers a month goal. I totally misscheduled! I know it’s entirely my procrastination’s fault, and if I had recorded vocals and mixed like two weeks ago I wouldn’t have this problem. I recorded the actual piano like last month and just have been sitting on this, so legit the only reason I didn’t record vocals and get this done was laziness. And that made my brain go into paranoid overdrive, because I thought of doing videos in my old, still photo style.
I’m planning to license this specific cover to be sold on digital music distribution sites, and had my friend do some art for that. So I was like “I’ll just use that instead!” and I went back and forth, back and forth about doing this. I don’t mind using animation’s for covers still, because there’s movement involved in that and it isn’t just a still photo. But I really want to stop using still images as a crutch, and almost back peddled into doing so, but I stopped myself!
Last night, I made the video really quick. I wrote out my video description, even uploaded it onto YouTube, had it unlisted to share to patrons, but when I was doing all that, I got this awful feeling in the pit of my stomach. I started getting super nervous that the quality wouldn’t be good, that this video wouldn’t get as many views as my last two, that I wasn’t doing my best. The first two were just me being wonky, but the last one I think was my brain going “Cryyyyystal you know you don’t want to do this stop stressing out over your self-imposed deadline” because even though I want to do two covers/musical pieces a month, the fact of the matter is, I didn’t plan well enough for that to happen in March. If I’m going to post a video, I want it to be one I’m not going to second guess (something I did a lot last year) and I want it to be the quality that I want, with guidelines I set forth. I’ve never done this before, but I kept the video unlisted, deleted the video and told myself to just record this weekend, and post the video next week. After that, I felt a lot better about my decision, but was glad to have gone through that process of uploading, not feeling right about it, and deleting, because if I hadn’t I would have been debating with myself about what to do about the video for ages.
One of my main reasons for not recording video was just because I wasn’t feeling being on video this week. But, that’s ok: I’ll wait until I feel better about being on cam and record. I’ve also set some guidelines in place for my video styles, because I don’t want to have a mental battle like this again XD so I figured I’d do it like this:
For arrangements that I worked super hard on like what I’ve been doing recently: Record myself on video, because those videos deserve to have me on video for them, because I’ve worked really hard on them!
Originals: Either choose to use an animation, or record myself on video. More leaning towards an animation, if my friend has something that I can use for certain originals, because I like the idea of having a scene playing while some video game inspired music is playing. Because, let’s face it, any original track I do that isn’t a song with lyrics is going to be RPG/JRPG inspired, that’s just my esthetic haha. On that note, I finished my first all instrumental original, and in March too! So I got my goal of getting an original track done in the month of March. I really like how it came out, even though it’s probably pretty basic! Once I finish up with this video, I’m going to work on releasing that one.
For covers with pre-existing backtracks: Haven’t decided yet, maybe a still photo? Or maybe I’ll set this one to have the option to choose between recording myself singing, animation, or still photo. But still using a still image just doesn’t sit right with me anymore, but we’ll see when I do a cover with a pre-existing backtrack how I feel. I think I’d probably just record live singing, though, but want to give myself flexible guidelines because I realize that’s just how my brain works.
In the End, I realized this was a really good thing that happened, because I touched on something I probably needed to deal with. Setting guidelines, and limitations for myself, and finding out that that sort of video doesn’t appeal to me anymore is a huge step forward, because I remember when recording myself on video just didn’t appeal to me haha. The fact that a still image vid wasn’t up to snuff is a great improvement on my YouTube mindset, that can only improve from here! I also learned that it’s ok to miss a deadline you set for yourself and make sure that missing the next deadline doesn’t happen again by having better time management. Next step: to not chicken out about licensing my covers, and to figure out how to master tracks for releasing on those platforms!